Heaven on Earth (Decade Edit)

The “Heaven on Earth” Playlist
“Back at Your Door” by Maroon 5
“I’m Kissing You” by Des’ree
“Heaven Sent” by Keyshia Cole
“What If” by Kate Winslet
“Kissin’ You” by Total

 

Notes

- “Alright!!” is performed by the Japanese rock/pop band Superfly and is the opening theme to the J-drama Boss.

- Another edit of “Heaven on Earth” exists; that takes place fifteen years after the end of Made for You and therefore is the “Fifteen-Year Edit.”

- You are definitely going to want to slap Charlene Gray. Just a warning!

_________________

“Heaven on Earth” (The Decade Edit)
Rated PG-13

It was bitterly cold, colder than she had ever remembered it had ever been in these parts. The north wind was merciless in her razor-sharp gusts, rendering those who dared to venture outside immobile and unable to breathe normally. She burrowed in her coat, gloves, and scarf, thankful for the long winters in New York that had prepared her for such weather.

The streets of Gracia were teeming with people who were hell bent on buying last-minute Christmas gifts for their loved ones and braved the unnatural cold. Danie was one of these patrons, passing by brightly lit and magnetic window displays on Gracia Row. She had already bought something for her baby grandson who was barely walking on his own. She couldn’t wait to give it to him, to see her son and his wife. Some would say that she had spent a little too much, but she wanted to indulge herself with the act of giving. It was the first Christmas in a while she had felt normal. Five years in fact. She wasn’t about to let it go to waste.

Things had been difficult when she had become a widow five years ago. The loss of her husband was sudden and almost unwarranted; he had been healthy and took no unnecessary risks on his life. That is, until a New Years’ Eve during which he and Danie had fought and he had stormed out of her life forever. At three a.m. on January 1^st, when others had been heading to bed after ushering in the New Year, Danie had been identifying her dead husband on a cold, metal table with her daughter gripping her hand tightly and her son sobbing brokenheartedly in the background. Her guilt had nearly consumed her in the aftermath, and then, as other facts became known to her, a sense of inadequacy had as well.

A tinkling bell roused her from her thoughts, and she was able to sidestep a sidewalk Santa before she could run into him. She gave him a polite smile and kept walking.

“Danie? Danie Chambers, is that you?”

Paused in mid-step in front of a jewelry store, Danie groaned inwardly. She’d recognize that voice anywhere. It was, quite frankly, a damn shame that she had to run into Charlene Gray two days before Christmas. But she would deal with it. She had dealt with worse, right?

Pasting a smile on her face, she turned toward Charlene, who was decked out in a red cashmere coat with a black scarf and gloves and accompanied by a couple of her simpering friends. Shit. She’s got an entourage. Even worse.

“Hello, Charlene,” Danie greeted her in an even tone that had come from years of skillful bullshitting in social circles.

The brunette gasped with delight and threw her arms out like it was the Friends reunion special and she was Courtney Cox-Arquette to Danie’s Jennifer Aniston. Danie suppressed a shudder as Charlene enveloped her in a quick embrace. Somebody up there really doesn’t like me…

“Oh Danie it’s so nice to see you out and about!” Charlene exclaimed. She sobered and put on a worried face. “I was so worried about you for a little while there. I know losing Matt was so difficult, and then it had to happen on New Years!” Charlene clucked her tongue and her human attachments echoed the sentiments. “So sad. Matt was a really good guy.”

“Yes,” Danie agreed with a pang, “he was. And thank you, Charlene, but I really have to go—”

“But it’s been so long since we’ve seen you,” Charlene babbled. “Please, stay a little while.”

“I actually have to meet my daughter for dinner,” Danie explained. “I would love to stay, but if I don’t get going, I’ll be late.”

“Oh…you mean one of the twins? How’re they doing now? I caught a glimpse of Shannon’s W cover a few days ago. She has an amazing talent. And the other one…”

Danie raised an eyebrow, letting some of her irritation to the surface. “Abigail, you mean. But as they are both not here yet, I’m not going to see them. I’m going to see Josie.”

Charlene looked confused as if someone tried to get her to recite the Pythagorean Theorem. “Josie?”

There was a lull as Charlene and Co. tried to remember Danie’s youngest daughter. She supposed she couldn’t blame them; the circumstances surrounding Josie and her creation were strange enough, especially since Josie had not been borne from Danie physically but resembled her enough that she could have been. Then the redhead nudged Charlene and said, “I know who she is. She’s related to that computer guy. Quatre Winner’s brother-in-law. Remember him?”

She paused, and her eyes lit up as she remembered. “Oh yeah! She’s Heero Yuy’s daughter.” Charlene suddenly made a face as if encountering an unpleasant memory. “I remember him. He wasn’t very nice.” Danie fought an eyeroll. Charlene thought that way because Heero had snubbed her. She’d made a pass at him—while she was married to Harold Gray no less—and he’d shut her down. For that alone Danie should have kissed his feet. “I’d almost forgotten he was dead. Truth is, it wasn’t a big loss. What happened to him anyway? I heard he…” She lowered her voice so she wouldn’t sully the ears of passers-by. “Killed himself.”

Danie’s heart wrenched at the thought of Heero’s death. He had killed himself right in front of her because he had been so tormented by a loveless life that he could not bear living any longer. And what was even more, he had loved her. He had loved her for nearly a quarter of a century and could not act on those feelings. He had been a good man, and he deserved more than Charlene talking about him like he was an errant fly.

“He passed away ten years ago,” Danie replied tightly. “The circumstances are unimportant now. And I would appreciate it greatly if you wouldn’t talk about him that way. He…was a good friend of mine.”

Charlene snorted. “Oh come on, Danie. If I recall correctly, you hated him.” She stared at Danie speculatively. “Unless…it had all been a front and Josie is actually your love child or something.”

Danie’s eyes darkened while Charlene’s friends gasped and choked on giggles. “And where would you get that idea?”

“Well, let’s be honest here. It never made any sense why you would care for the daughter of the man you loathed unless she was yours, too. Not to mention…well…” Charlene shrugged as if to say It’s not my fault—you asked for it. “People say that the only reason that Matt was with Deborah Cole that night was because they were having an affair.” She looked contrite as Danie’s sorrow became naked on her face. “I thought you wanted to know.”

Danie pursed her lips to keep them from trembling. She had heard the rumors about her husband and his accountant, but to have it thrown into her face that way after she had come so far was unbearable. But she wasn’t going to buckle. That was what Charlene wanted, to turn her into a sobbing, grief-stricken mess. She wasn’t going to have the satisfaction of doing that to Daniella Chambers.

Danie lifted her chin and forced the rawness into a corner. “I didn’t, actually. And damn you for thinking I did.” She let out a gasp of mock-surprise as Charlene opened her mouth. “Oh right. I forgot. You don’t have much of a brain anyhow so I can’t be too mad at you.” Charlene’s brown eyes widened as Danie’s lips curved upward. “Thank you for your…concern.” At that moment, Danie’s phone started singing the chorus to “Alright!!” It was a balm over the wounds Charlene’s cattiness had left on her heart. “Excuse me. I have to take this.” She broke away from Charlene and co., who were standing on the sidewalk in astonishment from her comment. It would take them a few minutes for them to get that she’d insulted Charlene. Oh well. Sucked for them.

“Hello?” Danie said into the phone as her boots clacked on the cold sidewalk. She was thankful to be moving again.

“Mom? Hey. Where are you?”

Danie sighed as she dug her keys out of her purse. She could see her car now, and as it was, she could not unlock it without the keys. “I’m sorry, sweetie. I was…” Gee, what would you call being sucker-punched by a spiteful bitch? “…waylaid by someone I didn’t want to talk to. You know how it is.”

She heard her daughter pause in whatever she was doing. “They mentioned Matt, didn’t they? I can hear it in your voice.”

Danie shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. It’s going to happen whether I want it to or not. That’s just life.” She finally freed her keys and pressed a button. Her locks clicked open and she breathed a sigh of relief that came out in a puff of steam. “I’ll be there in ten minutes. Don’t fret, darling. I’m fine. Really.”

“We’ll talk about it when you get here. Oh—there’s something I’ve got to tell you—”

Danie got into her car and threw her purse onto the passenger seat. She locked herself inside, turned the ignition, and put on her seatbelt one-handed. “You can tell me when I get there.”

“But Mom—”

“Whatever it is, I’m sure it can wait,” Danie assured. “See you in a little bit. Love you.”

“Love you too, Mom. See you.”

With that, Danie ended the call and put her phone away. She pulled into the flow of traffic and sped off toward Josie’s, unaware of what was in store for her there.

*           *           *

Meanwhile, ten minutes away in her warm, fragrant kitchen, twenty-six-year-old Josephine Yuy put her own phone aside and sighed. She shook her head and ran a hand through her shoulder-cropped black hair despite the thin sheen of flour on it.

“This is not good,” Josie remarked to the man sitting at her kitchen table, decorating gingerbread men. “This is really, really not good.”

Heero Yuy placed a gumdrop button on his current work-in-progress. He had killed demons, felled supernatural beings, and traveled between Heaven and Earth, but there was nothing as cathartic and meaningful than doing this—decorating sweets with his only daughter. He could sense her discomfort and knew the cause. Quite frankly, he was the cause. Well, only partially. The other part was on the way there.

Seeing Danie filled him with a bit of nervousness as well. When they had parted five years ago, it had not been on the best of terms. Things had not been going well for Danie and her husband, and seeing Heero had, ever since Heero’s death five years before then, always made Danie feel very conflicted. For most people, loving one person was trouble enough. But loving two? The tension and nerves present that Christmas had been thick enough to slice through and serve with gravy. It had made him feel worse that Matt died not long after, leaving some of their problems in abeyance.

Josie rounded the counter at that moment and took the chair across from Heero. She placed her elbow on the table and chin in her palm and asked, “Do you think it was true?”

Knowing what she was getting at, Heero looked at her, forgetting the cookies for a moment. “Josie, if it is true, how would it make any of this any easier? Danie would be hurt if she knew.”

“I’m not asking you because I want to tell Mom,” Josie insisted. “I want to know out of my own curiosity.”

Heero eyed her, making her feel all of twelve again. She didn’t like the feeling. “I’m not going to tell you. It’s none of your business.”

Josie pouted. She looked just like her mother then, and that tugged on Heero’s heart. “Why is it that you still treat me like I’m sixteen? I’m all grown up now, and I can handle off the adult stuff. Hell, I am an adult now.”

“Just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean that you have to know about other adults’ private matters,” Heero chided her. “That is childish.”

Josie threw her hands up in the air in frustration. “What do you mean? It’s not just some ‘other’ adult—it’s my mother!” Josie cried. She fumed at him. “You’d tell me if I were Uncle Duo or something.”

“Oh, so you’re accusing me of being sexist now? How cunning of you. At least you’re branching out in your accusations.”

Josie crossed her arms over her chest and gave him the patented Yuy death-glare. Yeah, he’d taught her well. Almost too well… “I’m your little girl so you feel the need to protect me from stuff. But I’m not a little girl anymore. If you told me, I could keep it to myself. I’m not some blabbermouth.”

Heero’s lips twitched but he didn’t smile. “Nothing you say is going to convince me that you should know. So stop trying.” He paused for a moment, flicked his gaze toward the oven. “Besides, the cupcakes are ready. Concentrate on those.”

Josie’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Wha…?” The oven timer dinged. She made a face at him as she rose. “Showoff.”

Heero smirked at her retreating back as she moved to the oven to retrieve her cupcakes. He finished decorating his incomplete gingerbread man as Josie set her cupcakes on the counter to cool.

He was poised to add icing to the last gingerbread man when Josie remarked, “I’ll bet if I were Aunt Crys, you’d tell me.”

Heero groaned and gave her an annoyed look that would have made a newbie Archangel piss in his pants. Unfortunately Josie was more tenacious than alarmed. “Josephine Midori Yuy—would you drop it already?”

Josie was prepared to fire back with a smart-aleck comment when they heard the knock on her front door. She shared a look with her father before shedding her apron. She was there.

“Be good, Heero,” Josie said sternly. “I mean it. She doesn’t know you’re here, so seeing you will be like sticking a finger in a light socket.”

As Josie strode out, Heero called after her, “I thought I told you not to call me ‘Heero!’ It’s disrespectful.” She waved a dismissive hand at him and kept walking. He muttered under his breath about impertinent daughters and dressed up the last of the gingerbread men.

He heard the door open and close. Female voices drifted toward him, and a strange sensation started at his spine and spread. Was that tingle one of anticipation? He had not seen Danie Chambers in the flesh in five years, but he felt as if he was about to meet her for a first date like a lovesick teenage boy. The nerves were there because he wasn’t sure how she was going to react to him. Things had been much different the last time.

He remembered like it had been two minutes ago. Christmas dinner had been at the Winner mansion that year because he was coming home, and Crys had invited Danie and her family. He had been sitting in the living room before they had moved into the dining room for the meal. Johnathan and Trevor had been playing a new video game, and Kristana had been telling him about all of the things in her life he had missed in the past five years. The doorbell had rung and something inside of him had shifted—much like it shifted now—and he had known she was there. It was the awareness of a supernatural love. When Crys had brought her into the room, he had idly shifted his gaze in her direction. She’d had a grinning twenty-one-year-old Josie under one arm and had been clad in a royal purple dress that’d set off her slim body to perfection.

Josie had looked up and had seen him talking to her cousin. When she’d shrieked his name happily, his eyes had met Danie’s for one long moment. He had heard her heart skip a beat, and the confidence and poise she’d possessed upon entering the room had drained away. She had been staggered, and in that moment she had known what her reaction to him really had meant.

Josie had grabbed her mother’s hand and had taken her along. After Josie had her hug, they had been faced with one another again. He had taken her hand and had said hello. And her saying his name had been music to his ears.

The sound of Danie’s chuckle brought him back to the present. He looked up as Josie entered the kitchen again, chattering about cannoli and crepes. Danie lagged behind but appeared a few beats later, dressed in jeans and a teal crew-necked sweater. She had been in the middle of a sentence when her gaze rested on Heero sitting at Josie’s kitchen table.

Her smile froze on her face and slowly faded into a mask of astonishment as she stared at him. She blinked twice, then said in a breathless voice, “Heero?” How could he be here…now?

“He came in this afternoon,” Josie explained conversationally as she slathered cream cheese icing over a perfect circle of red velvet cake. “We’ve been making sweets for Christmas dinner.” She looked at Danie and nodded at the seat beside Heero that was empty. “Take a seat and help Dad ice the cupcakes while I finish the red velvet.”

Danie hesitated for a moment before taking the seat to Heero’s right. She lowered herself to the wooden chair as Heero set aside the cookies to set. She shyly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, revealing tanzanite at her lobe. Then she looked at him with a small, bashful smile. Her coyness made her even more appealing.

“Hello, Danie,” Heero greeted her. Josie placed the pan of cupcakes in an empty space on the table, smirking to herself.

“Hello, Heero,” Danie greeted him back. “How are you?”

“I’m fine.” He stared at her for a second before adding, “But you’re not.”

Danie paused, hand over a cupcake. She wouldn’t have been more shocked if Heero’d reared back and slapped her across the face. “What do you mean?”

Heero raised an eyebrow. “Danie—I can hear what you’re thinking. Don’t forget. You can’t hide your innermost feelings from me.”

Danie looked away and smiled sort of sadly. “Not much gets past you.” She picked up a cupcake and turned back to him. “So tell me—could you do me a favor and pay a late-night visit to Charlene Gray? I think she deserves to be scared shitless one good time, and you look quite forbidding with your wings extended.”

Josie smirked from behind the island. Heero began frosting a cupcake with chocolate icing. “You better watch out. I think she’s been checking you out, Dad.”

Danie made a sound of indignation as her cheeks went pink. “I have not been…checking him out! I mean, he let out his wings once or twice around me. What was I supposed to do—cover my eyes?”

“You could have looked away,” Josie pointed out.

“It’s kinda hard not to look. I mean, it’s not a sight you see everyday, a man with wings.”

“Oh…” Josie nodded thoughtfully. “So you could say you found the sight beautiful?”

Danie looked uneasy. “Well…”

“So what—you’re trying to say that Dad’s ugly?”

Danie narrowed her eyes at Josie. “This is entrapment, pure and simple. I know what you’re doing and I won’t fall for it.”

Josie picked up the bare second layer of cake and placed it on the frosted one. She sighed gustily. “It’s a shame Christmas is in two days. Now I won’t be able to give Mom her perfect present.”

After a beat, Heero gave Josie a look of half-amusement, half-exasperation. Danie noticed this and asked, “What does she mean? What is she thinking, Heero? Tell me.”

Heero shook his head. “I think you would hurt her if you knew, so I think she should keep it to herself.” He passed his only child a meaningful stare. She batted her eyelashes coyly at him. “She wants to make it through the holidays alive.”

“Damn right,” Josie affirmed. “So I’ll stay away from Uncle Duo’s tropical rum punch. But I think getting Mom a five-year calendar of Heero Yuy pinups would not get me hurt.” Blushing tomato red, Danie threw a spoon in her direction, but she ducked in time, giggling hysterically.

“Josephine Yuy, you are a terrible, horrible person,” Danie said.

“But I’m also right. Right?” she prompted. “Dad would make an awesome pinup. Don’t deny it if it’s true.” When Danie didn’t speak, Josie said, “I’m sorry for picking on you, Mom. I just wanted to get your mind off whatever was bothering you earlier. And I’m guessing Charlene Gray had something to do with it.”

Danie played with the paper wrapping on a naked cupcake. “I was walking on the Row after getting Edward’s present and she stopped me, wanting to give me her condolences.” Danie rolled her eyes at the last word. “Honestly she really wanted to pour salt in my wounds. She always did.”

“What did she say?” Josie wanted to know.

When sorrow filled Danie’s eyes, Heero placed his hand on hers. She raised those sad eyes to his at the movement. “You don’t have to repeat what she said. I know it hurt you very much.”

A measure of gratitude crossed Danie’s features. “Thank you. I…”

“I say,” Josie began hotly, “we should go down to her place, strip her naked, and stuff her into a small space.”

Danie snorted with laughter. “Oh God—this is what I get for letting you hang around Aurora Bloom.” Then she exhaled, somber again. “No, sweetheart. It’s best to just ignore people like Charlene Daniels. If they see that they’re getting to you, they stick around to continue the torment.”

“If she keeps messing with you, I think you should do something about it,” Josie said.

“Danie doesn’t have to do anything,” Heero told her. Danie looked to him in puzzlement. “It’s a basic cosmic rule that anything you inflict upon someone else, you get it back tenfold.” He met Danie’s gaze. “Charlene will get whatever she deserves. Trust me.”

After a moment, Danie nodded. “I think I finally can,” she admitted softly, and went back to her cupcakes.

*           *           *

Once they were done, and the sweets were put away so they would be fresh, Danie shooed Josie away from the kitchen. Heero had made a quick visit to his sister’s and no one argued. She had fended off her daughter’s insistences that she didn’t have to clean up the mess, but she wanted to. She really, really wanted to. It gave her something to do while she processed everything that had occurred over the past few hours.

When she had walked into Josie’s kitchen and found Heero there, it had been a jolt. Somehow she had known that he would be there, but to see him in the flesh for the first time in half a decade? Phew. It had been like eating a hot tamale. She was surprised that she hadn’t started sweating profusely. Despite the enormity of the situation, the encounter had been quite…peaceful. Yes—she had been a bundle of nerves, no doubt about that. But a strangely consoling rapport had formed between the two of them, one with which Danie found herself comfortable. They could be friends.

When she was done with the chores, and the kitchen sparkled, she paused to listen out for Josie. Judging from the laughter and tone coming from her bedroom, she was talking to her cousin Aurora. Danie smiled faintly and decided not to disturb her.

Feeling over-warm and stifled, Danie unlocked the door to the balcony and stepped out. The cold hit her at once, but it wasn’t as stringent as before. It was slightly refreshing, like a cool shower after a sweaty afternoon. Some minutes passed, and she was lulled to thoughtfulness by the night sounds and found herself thinking of Heero again.

Five years ago, she had realized that she loved him. Five years before that, she had learned that he had loved her even when she’d thought he hadn’t. The more she learned, the more confused she became. Wasn’t knowledge supposed to be power? Instead, she felt tormented and confused. She remembered sitting at her vanity in her and Matt’s bedroom during that last and most painful fight. Harrison and Josie, thankfully, had been out of the house and they had argued in relative privacy. So what—now all of a sudden you love the bastard even after he nearly killed you? What do you expect me to do, just stand around and smile while you two act like you’re on your first date? Bullshit, Danie! I can have no part of this. She had wanted to make it all work—both the life she was having and the one she was supposed to have. Instead, she had unwittingly sent a good man to his death.

And you don’t think Matt didn’t have any intentions toward Deborah Cole? a part of her asked. Matt was not a horrible person, but he was human. Did you ever think that maybe the rumors were somewhat true?

Danie exhaled painfully, suddenly chilled to the marrow. She lifted her face to the sky as her eyes watered and hugged herself. “Oh Matt…what have I done?”

When she got no answer except for the twinkling stars above, she lowered her lids, and those warm tears spilled out onto her cheeks. Her legs slowly folded beneath her and she knelt to the cold ground, head dropped. She wept disconsolately, unaware of time or space.

That is, until she felt something downy brush her hand.

She almost ignored it. She had entrenched herself in her misery so deep that she was nearly unreachable. However, when warm hands were placed on her shoulders and she was suddenly encased in a cocoon of warmth, she opened her eyes.

She couldn’t see much, for something was blocking most of the light. She could see the balcony floor and a pair of male thighs. Out of the corner of her eye, something drifted downward and fell onto the crook of her arm. A black feather.

One of the hands moved and cupped her jaw. Someone moved her face toward the sky, but this time, the sky…wasn’t quite the same anymore. It was all…Heero. He filled her starlit winter sky.

His blue eyes were grave. She thought he was going to scold her for being outside like this, and it made her feel even worse. She was so pathetic. How could she have been so irresponsible? So caught up in her emotions? She prepared to babble out an apology when Heero said the most unexpected thing.

“You don’t have to be sorry, Danie,” Heero murmured.

Danie’s eyes shimmered with tears. “What…?”

“I said, you don’t have to be sorry,” Heero repeated. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You did everything you possibly could with the best of intentions.”

Danie stared up at him, shaking her head slowly in disbelief. “I hurt you. How do I deserve your love? Why don’t you hate me?”

“You don’t deserve my hate,” Heero told her. “And if the roles were reversed, you would agree.”

“But I hurt Matt. Aren’t you scared I’m gonna hurt you, too?”

“Danie,” Heero started, “you would never hurt me, and I know that for a fact.”

“How can you be so sure?”

He wiped away a tear with a gentle fingertip and knelt down until they were face-to-face. “Because you love me, that’s why.”

Danie inhaled sharply, eyes wide. She felt so naked, so exposed when he said that. He knew. “How…?” When he just gave her a bland stare, she tilted her head. “Oh God, am I that transparent?”

“Danie, when you can read minds, everybody’s transparent.”

“Then you know what I’m wondering.” Heero blinked at her, shock in those Prussian blue depths. “You know what’s bothering me. You also know the answer.”

Heero shook his head. “Danie, that’s not important now.”

“How can it not be?” Danie demanded. “I want to know if Matt cheated on me. I want to know if my stupid emotions and my stupid destiny drove him to be unfaithful. Did he love Deborah Cole or not?” There was a long pause. Heatedly, Danie grabbed Heero’s shirtfront, and the fabric was caught in her tight fists. “I want you to tell me. If you love me then you would tell me.”

“Yes,” Heero responded quietly, stopping her short. “And no. He loved her, was very fond of her, but was not in love with her. There was only one woman he loved. Unfortunately, that woman loved someone else, and he was starting to understand that it was bigger than anything she could ever feel for him. So he elected to go through the gates with Deborah as a final act of love.” Danie’s hands loosened and slid down as her jaw went slack. “There. Are you happy now?”

Danie sat back on her bottom, astonished. She had not quite expected that answer. At that moment, Josie appeared in the doorway, concern and bemusement on her face. She stopped and took in the scene before her. She opened her mouth to speak, but Danie climbed to her feet.

“Mom?” Josie asked.

“I have to go,” Danie said thickly, voice hollow. “Excuse me…” She walked past a speechless Josie and back into the apartment. Josie watched her until she disappeared, then looked to her father, who was still kneeling.

“Dad…what happened?” Josie demanded. Eyes downcast, Heero rose to his feet as well. He folded his wings back in and said nothing. Her eyebrows furrowed. “Is this another case of me not being worthy enough to know?”

The front door opened and closed. Heero lifted his gaze to her. Instead of looking annoyed, he seemed resigned and a little sad. “Come inside and I’ll tell you everything.”

*           *           *

A couple of hours later, Danie, clad in a nightgown, watched the flickering firelight as it chased the cold and shadows away. It was nearly midnight, and she was alone at her own place. When Matt had died five years ago, Danie had sold their house and gave whatever she didn’t want to keep to charity, unable to be in the midst of all of their memories, and moved into a smaller house on Blooming Rose Drive. She was close to Jessica if she ever got lonely, and everyone else was a phone call away. That was how she justified the seclusion. Now she wondered if it was a form of avoidance.

Her cell phone buzzed with a new message from Harry, who had been waylaid by a snowstorm in the Midwest. Danie ignored it, wanting to wallow in her own misery for a while. Hair still damp from her shower, she lowered herself to her bed and lay on her side.

A lesser woman would have been relieved at the revelation; the quandary of loving two men had been solved for her. Somehow Danie could not reconcile Matt’s final act of love, as Heero had dubbed it. It made her feel worse.

And yet…she still couldn’t love either one of them any less. She still loved Matt, but she loved Heero as well. Maybe even…more than she loved Matt. That was staggering to realize.

“Why do I love you?” Danie whispered aloud. “I shouldn’t, and I know I shouldn’t, yet I still do. What does that mean?”

No one answered. Danie continued to lie there until fatigue took her over and she closed her eyes. She fell into a light sleep.

She was awakened by the brush of fingertips across her cheekbone.

She knew who it was even before she opened her eyes. She had known he would come eventually; he loved her too much to leave her hurt and befuddled, especially since there was no one else that could console her.

“It was not as easy as you think,” Heero revealed softly. “Deborah nearly refused because she loved him too much.”

“There’s a lot of that going around,” Danie noted idly. She shifted her focus to his face. “This should be wrong.”

A crease formed in Heero’s brow. “Why?”

“A part of me feels like I should be with Matt right now, or at least not with you.” This time she reached out and touched him. “But the other part wants nothing more.”

The crease disappeared and Heero’s face softened. “You shouldn’t deny your emotions.” He took her hand in his. “You can tell me to leave at any time, and I will. I won’t mind it.”

Danie chuckled. “I wouldn’t do that.”

Heero raised an eyebrow and feigned bewilderment. “And why wouldn’t you, Danie?”

Danie stopped short suddenly, overcome with nerves. “Well…you know why.”

“No, I don’t.”

Danie fumed at him. “Heero, stop playing stupid. Leave that to Duo. You can’t do it convincingly. Besides, you know the reason why. You can read my mind, so how can you not?”

“Say it,” Heero prodded, sitting up on his elbow. “I just want to hear you say it aloud.”

Danie took a moment and steeled herself. This was all so scary and new…but thrilling at the same time. Butterflies fluttered in her belly and it was then, as she stared up at Heero, that she realized it was love. And what sense was there to deny the truth? She had never been one to stick her head in the sand—well, about most things. This love, so natural and right (she was having a little trouble with that part, but it would improve over time), was the truth.

So she took a deep breath and finally admitted, “I love you, Heero.”

He shifted, and lowered his head until his forehead was touching hers. Her heart skipped at their close proximity. They had never been this near to one another, but she found that she liked it. “I love you, too.” With her free hand, she reached up and traced his mouth. He trembled a bit, and her lips curved.

“Dammit,” Heero swore. “You’re going to get me banished to Hell.”

Danie laughed at that. “I’m just touching you. How is that going to get you banished to a fiery pit?”

He lifted his head a bit so he could better stare her in the eyes. “Your thoughts?”

Danie’s smile faded and her cheeks flushed. “Oh yeah. Right.” She giggled nervously, then sobered. “Heero…you’re a virgin, aren’t you? Well, almost nearly.”

He blinked. That had been out of nowhere. “The only woman I ever slept with was Julia,” he replied. He halted then, thinking about what that meant. “Technically, since Julia was a part of you, I guess my first time was with you.”

“Hmm.” Danie considered this. How funny life was! “Was it as good for you as it was for me?”

“Actually…I don’t remember it…” Danie’s mouth dropped open. “We had gotten drunk on the night of your wedding and…” Heero trailed off at the sound of Danie’s gasp. “What’s the matter?”

A moment she had cast aside as random weirdness suddenly came to mind; she had been getting ready for her wedding night with Matt, and while she had been in the shower, she’d had this strange vision of a woman—who’d looked remarkably identical to her—and a familiar dark-haired man making passionate love. She’d thought she’d had too much champagne at the reception, but now she realized…

“Oh,” Heero said thoughtfully. “I see.”

Danie winced, feeling mildly itchy at the amorous memory. It felt even stranger that he had plucked it out of her brain. “Weird, huh? I guess it was one of those cosmic glitches or something because of our connection with one another.” She placed a hand on his cheek and turned his face toward hers. “But I’m sure someday you’ll get a chance to…experience it with all of me.”

He turned into her hand and pressed his lips to her palm. It was her turn to tremble. “I can’t wait.”

As he took her free hand and brushed his lips across her fingertips, she lost her breath. “Heero…” she managed.

He stopped and looked at her. “I’m arousing you, aren’t I? I’m sorry.”

Danie shook her head vigorously. “No, no—it’s fine. I…” She smiled coyly, and suddenly she seemed a teenage girl again. “I like it. And…I want more.”

“More?” Danie’s head moved up and down once. “You do realize that we can’t—” Danie’s head bobbed again. “Tell me what you want, and if it’s within means, I’ll do it.”

“I want…you to kiss me.” She waved a hand. “That’s all. We can save the rest…for the right time. I don’t want to get you in trouble.”

Heero shifted closer until their faces were a centimeter apart. Her heart thudded against his chest and he knew it was going to be as wonderful as she hoped it would be. “Thank you,” he whispered, voice so soft it was merely a breath.

“Anything for you,” Danie mouthed. She truly meant it, now more than ever, without a shadow of a doubt. That was the best thing that anyone had ever given him.

He kissed her until she was breathless.